Okay. There seems to be some confusion about pants and to be perfectly honest, I’m not surprised.
In England, pants are underwear. Otherwise known as knickers, briefs, grundies, or (if large), Bridget Jones’s. They can also be known by type (eg G-string, boxer, Y-front etc).
Dear reader, one can imagine the trans-Atlantic shockwaves caused by the overheard statement “I wore my new red pants to Emma’s party last night with my red satin Jimmy Choos”. It’s enough to get the office blogger quite (needlessly) overexcited.
But what the confused American in question asked me (after the Brits involved had all calmed down a bit, stopped giggling and wiped away their tears) was, “What did I say that was so wrong?”. And the answer, my lovely cousin-from-across-the-Pond, is that YOU are RIGHT and WE are WRONG. Oh yes. Because we use the term pants as a shortened version of ‘underpants’. And I think we are all in agreement as to what underpants are. However, we Brits are lazy and careless with our mother tongue, so ‘pants’ they have become.
Now it doesn’t take a college professor with a degree in logic to work out that if underpants are the undergarment, then pants must be the garment worn on top, yes? Yes. So you can relax now and I shall even give you licence to feel just a tad smug if you want to (I would if I were in the same boat, I assure you).
However, just be aware that when in Britain, you may wish to refer to your ‘trousers’, as approaching someone and commenting “I love your pants!” may not get you quite the reaction you were anticipating.
And, chaps, please remember that if you find a belt on your trousers uncomfortable, whatever you do, do NOT go into a store and ask for suspenders! Because that’s a garter-belt. And you want braces.
Do you know what? I’ve just penned this post, re-read it and I don’t know whether to publish it. It’s pants!
Ah, yes. Pants also means rubbish. Useless. Not good.